apps with an edge

 

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• crapchat: the social messaging app people use when taking a dump. all emojis would be poo-themed.

• puber: the ride sharing app for nudists

• doppelganger: a social app that uses facial recognition algorithms to match users up with their physical double

• develop a virtual companion app called stingman, which puts a virtual holographic sting by your side for counsel and support in challenging social situations

• a dating app called polygraph that uses biometrics to detect if a user is lying whenever they send a text

• oochie coochie: an app that translates speech into cloying baby talk

• wallflower: the new social media app for people who want to ignore everyone

• deep fake: the social app that lets user craft uncanny digital fakes of themselves so they can share fake content of themselves

• followed: a social media app where the only activity is gaining followers, nobody posts any content

• yoga bitch: a mindfulness app for unashamedly materialistic women who do yoga mostly to look hot

• a gps app called manifest destiny that tells you the name of the slaughtered indigenous people whose land you are standing on, enabling your to feel guilty no matter where you are

• a diet app called hunger strike that radicalizes users into staging hunger strikes. the app's algorithms identify causes of interest and the app uses subtle propoganda and emotional manipulation to radicalize the user.

• facemob: a social app that encourages division and arguing

• oubliette: the social app for people who have been cancelled

• a social app for narcoleptics called snoozer, that automatically snaps and uploads sleeping selfies to one's feed

• a browser extension for militant non-binaries that automatically purges gender-specific language from web pages

• a social app for snarky bros called cool story, bro where sincere sharing is frowned upon and mocked

• a dating app called downpour for people who like getting rained on

• a social media app for posting near-death experiences called almost "living your best almost-snuffed out life!"

• an app called orphans, for selfies with mismatched socks

• a social app for ocd germophobes called rinse and repeat

• a social app for onanists called circle jerk

• an app called greta that is just sound clips of great thunberg lecturing you about your global responsibilities

• an app called ishit, for sharing defecation selfies

• a dating app that caters to people who claim to have seen sasquatch called sighted

• a social app for people who have been cancelled by far-left or far-right cancel culture called scarlet letter

• a porn fighting app that transforms the young bodies of porn stars into the saggy aged bodies of octogenarians in real time on your computer screen

• a dating app for the blind called blind loving the blind where specially trained seeing eye dogs handle the swipe left/right duties

• a mindfulness app that takes an unflattering selfie of you and posts it to all your social media before you can stop it if you fail at mindfulness with your digital device

• a community-building app called cthulhu for those who eagerly await the end of the world

• a mindfulness/anti-porn app called fapp that uploads an undeletable screenshot of your porn search history to your social media channels if you fail at being mindful

• a lovecraftian dating app called eldritch relations

• a mindfulness phone app that connects to your paypal and deducts $10 to give to charity each time you fail at being mindful. and another that administers an electric shock. buy the paid version to unlock higher voltages.

• a dating app for people who have been declared legally dead called heartbeat

• the beuna vista social network - the social community for cuban musicians only

• a dating app for people who self-amputate called stump

• a social media app called redacted, where most words in posts are obscured by a thick black line mere minutes after being published

• a social platform devoted solely to updates on women's sexual moods called clitter

• a dating app that matches up mass shooters with mass shooting survivors. only available in america.

• a toilet training app for kids called go potty

• a dating app for white supremacists called final solution

• sub-twitter: an app for tweeting out subtext

• a job networking site for swingers called kinkedin

• an ISIS dating app called jihad

• micro-twitter. 16-character limit. 'for when twitter is too much.'

• a dating app for practitioners of abusive sex called safe word

• a dating app for covid-19 positive called okcovid

• a dating app for arsonists and pyromaniacs called hotstuff

• a dating app for sociopaths called exploit

• linkedin for dead people, called linkedout. help the dead celebrate their posthumous job anniversaries. endorse the no-longer living for the skill sets they possessed when they were still alive.

• a dating app for centenarians called methuselah

• a dating app for birds called plumage

• a dating app called nope that makes it impossible for users to match

• a phone app called ipoop that analyzes the screen surface to quantify the amount of trace fecal matter that is on it

• instagrammar. where people post selfies of themselves correcting improper grammar in public signs.

• a hook-up app called spank, for people who don't want to date or fuck, but who only want to meet strangers to get or receive spankings

• dating app for jam band followers called plenty of phish

• a mobile game for white racists called plantation: "save the american way of life from woke antifa libs by restoring your confederate plantation back to it's glory. make america great!"

• a dating app for people obsessed with the little rascals called otay cupid

• dating app for white supremacists: ok kkk cupid

• dating apps for today's progressives:

  • plenty of woke fish​

  • ok non-gendered cupid

  • non-binary match

• a phone app called shit detector that measures the amount of trace fecal matter on your phone screen and notifies you every morning what the levels are​

• a photo-sharing app called shitstagram where users share photos of themselves on various toilets, another called puddle where users share photos of themselves splashing in puddles

• develop a chatgpt marriage counselor app

• total war: an adversarial dating app for those who hate the opposite gender. harrassment and scamming are encouraged

• a darkweb dating app for those who secretly enjoy workplace sexual harassment called lookingformycuomo

• a dating app for perverse decadents called caligula